Se'er
A Se’er is someone who sees and foresees. It is a gift. They must have patience, tolerance and courage to see and know what is true. These are qualities I want to nurture in myself. For these are qualities that I see as bringing peace, a sense of a better future, one that I can foretell and make happen. There are times when we see or think we see the future and it is scary. I want the grace to no longer be frightened and let the future come, as a Se’er sees it, speaking in poetry as if for another. Se’er, help me connect to my spiritual truth.
Hilary Zayed

To enlarge Hilary's exhibit, click here.

Hilary Zayed's career goal was to become a therapeutic riding instructor. She loved horses and thought that teaching special needs' children would be a way to combine teaching and riding. Her goal required a four-year college degree in any field. She went to USM and chose art education as a major. "During a second semester drawing course, my instructor told me that I stunk!" Hilary laughs. She opted for a degree in special education and elementary education. As it turned out, a horseback riding accident was the impetus that led Hilary on a personal journey to reinventing herself into that artist no one expected her to be.

On a Saturday in April of 2006, Hilary was riding her Tennessee walking horse, "Poppy", with a friend, exploring a wooded trail. Hilary explains, "Poppy was feeling lazy and we rode for several hours, just enjoying the day. That's all I remember until I found myself lying on the ground, alone."

Later she was told that her friend, riding ahead of Hilary, turned around and saw Hilary "about eight feet in the air above the horse."

They surmised that Poppy bucked and threw Hilary off. She landed on the ground with such impact her riding helmet cracked. Her friend had gone for help.

Hilary was taken to the local hospital emergency room where she was diagnosed with a damaged pelvis and a concussion and discharged home with instructions to rest.

Hilary, who was teaching at the time, assumed her normal role when school started shortly thereafter. However, she became increasingly challenged by a deteriorating mental and physical condition. She experienced dizziness, progressively severe headaches and chest pains. Intermittently seeking medical treatment for these symptoms did not eliminate them. She was referred to a neurologist who diagnosed her with post concussion syndrome.

"I went through three years of spiraling with new symptoms replacing old ones. I was so discouraged and lonely because no one could help me," says Hilary.

Her neurologist ultimately made a referral to New England Rehabilitation Hospital's Brain Injury Clinic for more intense therapy. Hilary's treatment program at NERHP's Brain Injury Clinic included occupational therapy, speech therapy and recreational therapy. Her limitations included difficulty with balance, vision shifts and the inability to separate background noise from something or someone she was trying to listen to. Her cognition was impaired.

Sue Hitchcox, OTR/L (r) guides Hilary through a Driver Assessment Program exercise.

"We worked on many of the basic life skill activities that a person needs to be self sufficient, such as scheduling, organization and planning my day, week and even my sessions," says Hilary.

Sue Hitchcox, Hilary's occupational therapist explains, "Hilary's biggest challenges were problem solving and community mobility. One day we planned to go to the library. Hilary was faced with the unexpected, from putting money in the parking meter, to dealing with construction noises and then having the library closed. Even though the trip had been planned, she was forced to deal with unplanned events. Strategies for each challenge had to be talked out and implemented."

Hilary and Sue spent several months on driving skills, working on reflex, attention and cognition. Hilary has resumed driving on her own, but limits herself when she feels overwhelmed or tired.

"I am learning how to accept limitations and that's okay," says Hilary.

Discovery Through Recovery
It was during this time of recovery that Hilary discovered a talent, one that a prior college teacher doubted.

While in therapy at New England Rehab, Hilary expressed her interest in art and attended some therapeutic art classes, led by Kathy Kroll, Certified Therapeutic Recreational Specialist. Following her accident, Hilary had taken an adult art class in mosaics and brought some of her pieces to NERHP . She told stories about each piece, how she had envisioned the project and what it symbolized to her. Kathy discovered the huge potential of Hilary's creativity, both therapeutic and educational. She encouraged Hilary to assemble an exhibit of the works she completed during the period of change in her life. Hilary named her exhibit Reinventing Oneself ~ A Personal Journey. The exhibit consists of eleven separate pieces of art, with corresponding passages that speak to the message of her art.

Hilary (r) shares her artistic talents by volunteering her time with other NERHP patients. Tina Callahan, a stroke survivor, appreciates Hilary’s advice.

"I wanted Hilary to share her talent with others" Kathy states. "She has not only assembled a visual exhibit, but she eloquently describes each piece and why it has meaning for her. In order for words and art to be meaningful, it needs to be shared. And for Hilary to be willing to do that makes me very thankful. She has touched many lives already."

Hilary has given a presentation to NERHP's Brain Injury Support Group about what her exhibit has meant during the different stages of her recovery. Kathy feels that the process of her art, her displays, her personal stories and her presentations have all played a part in Hilary's rehabilitation and reinvention of herself.

It's Not Over, It's Just Beginning
Hilary's personal journey continues as she explores new paths that are emerging. She has been invited to exhibit her art work within the community, and to speak about the experiences she has had to overcome while living with a brain injury. Hilary hopes to use her exhibit to tell the story of Reinventing Oneself ~ A Personal Journey, as a way to educate others about brain injury, to open up conversations for people to talk about their own personal journeys, and to find connections and new opportunities for reinventing oneself.